Rebecca Taylor, aka Self Esteem, has two aspects to her persona, as presented via her second album, Prioritise Pleasure: The indefatigable activist and the unapologetic hedonist. Regarding the former, Taylor adopts the feminist mantle with ease. She extolls the strength, resilience, and resourcefulness of women while advocating for their rights, festively and militantly. Regarding the latter, Taylor celebrates the female body and eroticism in its myriad forms.
She’s an unchagrined sensualist and inclusivist, rejecting patriarchal precepts, including heteronormative standards and traditional notions re: modesty, demureness, etc. Needless to say, Self Esteem will not be endorsing Belah Rose’s Christian how-to book, Delight Your Husband.
With her new and third album, A Complicated Woman, these two aspects are still present, though they’re more integrated and streamlined. The activist has become the coach and advocate. The hedonist has evolved into the embodied woman who no longer needs to deny or prove herself. Whatever the newly fashioned persona might be, the catchy beats, hooky melodies, and party vibe are still present.
That said, Taylor has never subscribed to the ‘party to forget’ approach. Discussions about conditioning, conventions, and the nature of reality will never be sidelined. No one has to check their pain, grievances, or talking points at the door; to the contrary, disparate emotions, impulses, and outlooks are welcome. As a host, Taylor is serious and playful, no-nonsense and fun-loving.
There’s also, and importantly, a distinctly triumphant feel to A Complicated Woman. Self Esteem has found a greater sense of peace and resolve since the release of Prioritise Pleasure. The opener, “I Do and I Don’t Care”, is a reflection on how authorities abuse their power and how protocols in schools, families, and churches can discourage and suppress individuality. The sting of hurtful words or a dismissive stance can linger for years. As if to express a sense of overcoming these experiences in her childhood, Taylor concludes, “We’re not chasing happiness anymore, girls / We’re chasing nothing,” which is to say, we have and are everything we need.
“Focus Is Power” is built around Taylor’s pitch-perfect voice and an uber-hooky chorus that wouldn’t be out of place on Beyoncé‘s Renaissance (or Cowboy Carter). “I deserve to be here”, she belts, conjuring an image of a massive crowd swaying their arms in the stadium air. “If Not Now, It’s Soon” is also a sublimely exultant piece, as Taylor underscores the importance of self-awareness, how intuition and gut sense will invariably carry one through confusing and uncertain times. The message is unequivocal and emphatic: trust yourself and who you are; trust your goals and your capacity to achieve them.
On “Mother”, Self Esteem makes clear that she’s not a potential partner’s “therapist, cleaner, or tailor”; or, more pointedly, their mother. Carried by a transportive beat, the track brings to mind Charli XCX if she had entered the studio after completing a Landmark workshop and plowing through Helen Hunt’s ‘Doing Imago Relationship Therapy’. Throughout, Taylor calls for the person with whom she’s involved (or may be involved) to embrace their confidence, their adultness, to interact and participate without the baggage of unprocessed issues.
“Logic, Bitch!”, despite the cranky title, spotlights Taylor’s ability to deliver a semi-tearjerker a la Caroline Polachek, her shimmery vocal accompanied by strings and piano, as she addresses the need to move on from someone for whom she still feels love. “Cheers to Me”, meanwhile, captures Taylor as she more consummately and critically reflects on a destructive relationship (“The worst idea I had was you”). Her voice is supple, accented by well-sculpted synths, cheery beats, and a palimpsest of reverb-dashed back-up vocals.
“Lies” is a clubby take that points out the tendency to self-deprecate, to “smile and say I don’t mind”. Nadine Shah makes a notable cameo, infusing the track with signature urgency. “69” is perhaps the album’s high point, at least energetically and rhythmically. Self Esteem is at her edgiest and most dance-oriented, yet also her most tongue-in-cheek. The beat is rave-y, the melody is impeccably pop-centric, and the lyrics are mischievously sexual. The track’s ending veers into a gospel-inflected sound, voices singing “oh Lord” over and over. The audience could be on ecstasy at three AM or speaking in tongues at a church service.
A Complicated Woman brims with exemplary vocals, winning beats, and Taylor’s seamless pivots from the risqué to the empathic to the exhortative. While the album’s cover presents Taylor dressed like a character from The Handmaid’s Tale, replete with a murderously defiant expression, the tone here is less confrontational and more harmonious than one might anticipate.
While some listeners will miss the wryer and bombastic timbre of Prioritise Pleasure, A Complicated Woman shows Taylor stepping into a more grounded and rangy perspective. She’s overcome numerous challenges. She’s learned to live in the world and her own skin. She’s free. Perhaps her listeners, inspired by her example, will be reminded that they too “deserve to be here”.